anxiety,

Life: Losing Control

12:00:00 AM Arianne 4 Comments



Today, I wanted to do a little reflection and talk about control. If this isn't something you like to read, feel free to exit now and come back this Sunday for my January Favorites!

This week had been a roller coaster where I felt like the car was just going downhill more than it was going up. I felt as if I was asked to only do what was asked of me as opposed to doing what I thought was right. I admit, when I was in college, I was lazy and didn't have the desire to reach my potential. I was happy to simply be a puppet. However, as I've entered the "real world," I've noticed a difference. I wanted to be the best that I could be whatever it was that I was doing at the time.

This week, I felt like I was being forced to hold back from achieving that goal. There was this saying that was given to me as an advice:

"Never stop doing your best just because someone doesn't give you credit."

I've struggled to keep this in mind when I was in difficult situations like the ones I faced this week. I retreated into myself and became very resentful. As a result, I stopped doing my best and I adopted an "I don't give a sh** what they think about me now" attitude.

I've created a metaphor for my anxiety: an empty glass bottle with water as my anxiety. There was a time this week when I could feel the water rising and bubbling. There was also a time when I wished for the water to simply overflow.

As I was telling my therapist, I've overcame my fear of my own anxiety. I now look at it as a form of relief. I could continue to try and prevent the water from rising to the top, or I could just let go and let it overflow, then there would be no water left. Wouldn't that give me such peace? I think so.

I am setting myself a goal this year to learn to accept more of the things I can't control and to let go of the things around me that displeases me.

I've written a few lines during my troubled state. Click the button if you'd like to read them. Thank you for reading if you got this far. Stay beautiful :)








4 comments:

  1. That is such a great saying and works very well in my job, lol. I will remember it!

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  2. Go for what you want and be happy :) Setting a goal is a great way. I Hope everything is turning out okay!
    Jade x

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    1. I'm working on it; sometimes I just wish it was easier to do as well :)

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